16 April 2012

Being Bold

I'm sad that Blogging from the Heart is over. 

I feel like I gained so much confidence in my writing, and more importantly, in myself during this online class. And I know I've gained some great friends through the supportive community of my classmates. 

I'm so glad I took the class. 

But I tell you, there's been an unexpected side effect of this class. 

I've gotten bolder. 

In public, nonetheless. 

I speak up more often now. 

I worked out of Starbucks this afternoon. A rare luxury I allow myself (working from Starbucks could be an expensive habit) once in a blue moon when I've got a heavy workload and need a boost of motivation. 

As I worked, I generally didn't pay attention to the other customers. I was there to work. Until a woman sat down directly across from me. And her hair, oh my, her hair. Well, I couldn't help but notice it out of the corner of my eye. 

So wild and free. Not fully curly, but a definitive curl-wave action going on. Just like my hair when I let it have its way. The same way I love my hair, if I'm honest. And better yet, it was free to go grey as it wished. No dye job visible. The best part was, it looked graceful and elegant in its wild and free way.....not haggard, like we so often describe women who chose to go grey naturally. 

It was, quite simply, how I hope I have the courage to go grey when it's my turn. 

And after I sat and admired her hair for a while, as I packed up to go, I couldn't resist being bold and walking over. The boldness was bubbling up out of me at this point. 

"Excuse me," I said, "this might sound awkward, but I just wanted to tell you that I love your hair."

She smiled and blushed and stammered out a pleased-but-surprised thank you. 

And I felt better. 

I think she did too. 

So thank you, Susannah and my Blogging from the Heart classmates. Thank you for helping me rediscover my voice again. For helping me find the moments I'm passionately emotional, in both good and bad ways. For helping me find the courage to say what's in my heart and on my mind. For helping me be bold again. For helping me find the audacity to really be me, the genuine KtMac, instead of the KtMac I thought society expected. Thank you. 


Tat @ Mum in search said...

It takes so much boldness to approach someone we don't know and say something nice, doesn't it? You probably made that lady's day!

Karen C said...

Way to go KT! What a great way to step outside your comfort zone and change someone's day.
I'm so glad we've been on the BFTH journey together.

KT Mac said...

Tat....it really does take an incredible amount of boldness to speak up, which is a shame, since we're generally so happy to be on the receiving end of a random compliment. I'm hoping the more I do it, the easier it will be.

Karen....thank you! I'm so glad we've started this journey together. Here's to new friends!

Katherine said...

I love this post! You go girl! That was so brave of you. I want to see this lady's hair to get the courage to let mine go gray! And, I didn't know you were in Chicago. My hands down favorite US city!!

KT Mac said...

Oh Katherine! Thank you! It was just such beautiful hair....I wished I had a cool smart phone so I could've secretly snapped a picture or two to share. And yes, Chicago is my favorite US city too!! No place like sweet home Chicago.

Jill said...

This is so, so, so great! Being brave can be fun :)

KT Mac said...

Jill - you're right! Being brave is fun! (Well, once you get over the initial fear...) Here's to more tiny moments of bravery for all of us!

nanettefayephotography said...

KT, So happy for you that you have refound your voice. Really so much fun, and takes lots of courage, to compliment a stranger. But makes everyone's day a little brighter! And love your self-portrait!

KT Mac said...

Nanette....thank you! It feels good to be "me" again and to be brave enough to speak up to a stranger. And you're right, it made my day better too. :) Joe is the one who gets the credit for this picture....I was being silly and trying to do cartwheels in the park and he couldn't resist trying to snap the pictures. I loved this one.